Moms should all automatically be prescribed muscle relaxers.

What. a. day.

For those of you who don't know, the X-man started daycare on Monday as a kind of respite until our little family is back on their feet. He did so well - on Monday and Tuesday. Apparently someone at daycare was carrying a virus though, and he managed to catch it his very first day. Wednesday morning Brian came in and asked if I thought he was running a fever. I really thought he must be joking. What was I going to do with a sick Xavier and a 3 week old Sylvia???
This is what I would do....

In general, the last three days either Xavier has been unattended and getting into whatever he could, or Sylvia has been in her crib screaming. This was due to my attempt to keep them in completely separate rooms at all times to keep Sylvia from catching this Swine-ish kind of virus. Yesterday afternoon Sylvia was, as she had been for the last two days, crying in her crib. So I went upstairs, took off my outer layer of clothing (I had grown accustomed to wearing two layers - the Xavier layer, and the Sylvia layer.), and scrubbed my hands and arms up to my elbows so that I could pick up my baby girl. I had just gotten her quieted down when Xavier crawled into the room. I put Sylvia down and got Xavier out before he could wipe his snot covered face all over the room. I went halfway down the stairs and called for Xavier, trying to get him convinced that it was more exciting downstairs. Well, he sure did get excited, so excited that he crawled toward me and right off the top stair. Luckily I caught him, but not in time to avoid the fat lip that came next. With Sylvia screaming in the next room again, I rocked Xavier until he calmed down. He was getting hungry, so I put him in his high chair and buckled him in with his pediasure and some snacks, changed my clothes (back to my Sylvia clothes), scrubbed down again, and went to calm Sylvia again.
Deep breath, but it only gets better!
She was hungry, so I fed her, thinking Xavier was safe and strapped in his chair. About three quarters of the way through the feeding though, I hear the ceramic bowls that we keep on the kitchen table clanging together. So I prematurely end the feeding and put Sylvia back in her crib (that made her very happy. I'm pretty sure I would have been disowned as a mother yesterday if she could talk.). I went downstairs to find Xavier laying on his belly on the table, with UNO cards strewn across the dining room, playing with all the fun little trinkets that had gathered in the bowls on the table. I walked in, and he just smiled a cute little smile that said, "I know this is not what you want me to be doing, but I sure am cute doing it." I went over to assess the damage and was bombarded by the smell of his diaper. ughhh. So I decided to ignore the mess all over the kitchen, and just to change his diaper and put him down for a nap. Then I'd have some time to comfort Sylvia, who was still screaming in her crib. I took him up and unbuttoned his pajamas to change his diaper, but upon pulling his foot out of the pj's, I found it covered in, what is that?, oh, that's POOP! Somehow, his diaper had come halfway off, he had pooped, and both the feet of his pj's were full of his previous two meals. In the feet of the pj's he had been walking around in, and crawling across the kitchen table in. Not knowing what to do, I took him down to the kitchen and laid him on the floor, while singing loudly across the house to Sylvia. I cleaned off his feet and threw away the pj's, and took him to the bathroom. I ran his bath and got him in, when I heard a THUMP from the room where Sylvia was. Minor heart attack in play, I scrubbed myself down and ran into the room. She was fine (screaming, but fine), but just as I got into her room, Xavier slipped and fell in the tub. So I run back into the bathroom to an inconsolable, poop covered little boy in the bath. I finished his bath in a hurry, got him dressed, and put him down for a nap - at which time I got Sylvia and was able to calm her to sleep.


AAAHHHHH, quiet.

All I could do was sit on the couch and laugh. Hilarious. I love being a mom.