Our home is so full of joy. I can't really imagine anything else I'd rather be doing that being a mama to these two. Motherhood was something I had to grow into with Mena and Cassandra. It wasn't something that felt so natural, or completely fulfilling to begin with. But as God has worked in my heart, and opened my eyes, I can see there is nothing else more important than loving these kids. And I love it.
The X- man had court at the end of last week. The boys will start having visits with their mom (not a huge fan of this...) and dad is still out of the picture (thank goodness.). The state brought out pictures of X when they first picked him up from his home. Our caseworker said that they were so disturbing that she refused to look at them. I'm so glad we didn't have to see. Several things happened at court, but most importantly the court ordered that X-man be moved into his brother's foster home as quickly as possible. They stated that with the progress he's made that there is no reason for them not to be living together anymore. This is such a huge blessing for him. With that said, we are severely going to miss this little guy. He has brought light and joy to our home, and we love him so very much. We're hoping that we will be able to provide respite for his new foster home occasionally, so we will still get to see him. He has such a beautiful soul, and I know God has something huge planned for his life, his life that really only started a couple of months ago.
Sylvia had her one month doctor's appointment. She is a whopping 9 pounds and is 22 1/4 inches long! She's growing so fast! She's smiling a lot now, and has just started making noises other than crying - which always earns an 'awww' or an 'ooooh' around here. We're pretty much in love with her.
With X-man getting ready to leave, we are in prayer about what God would have for us next. We are considering only doing respite and emergency placements for a couple of months before taking another long term placement. However, I also want us to search our hearts on our motivation to do so. It would be nice to have a little bit of a quiet break, some more time for just Brian and I....but with the wrong motivation, these are very selfish reasons to take a break. I don't want to place our own wants before what God has put before us. So, we will keep praying - and if I have any guesses on God's plan for our family, we will have another little one shortly.
Prayer would be greatly appreciated right now.
-For X-man, his heart, the move, his transition, the case, and the wisdom of the caseworkers involved.
-For God to continue to refresh mine and Brian's hearts even when it hurts to say goodbye to our kids. That we would be prepared to love the next little one that will come to us just as much as we have loved before.
-For wisdom to know where to go from here - what is best for our family, but more importantly what is best for God's family.