April 16, 2012

Here for…a while.



Well, there have been some updates to Bella’s case, but I’m glad that I was lazy about posting them because they’ve changed hourly for the last week.  (Maybe an exaggeration.)


Week before last, Mom screwed up.

At this point in her recovery, Bella’s illness is not even that difficult to treat/manage.  It doesn’t take the intense amount of time, worry, and attention that it did when she first came to us.  None the less, it was either just too much effort for her Mom, or just wasn’t on her radar.  A pretty big deal.  And one of the initial concerns in the case.

As far as I can tell, Dad is doing everything he can, but he is working his butt off all day every day to pay the bills – so she is the primary caregiver during visits. 


At the same time that this crap hit the fan, the worker also uncovered some things about visits (through conversation with Bella) that were less than impressive.  Nothing that is a huge deal, but things that shouldn’t be an issue.




They’ve cut her visits back to two days per week, and now she is only there Wednesdays through Friday.  They scheduled it for during the week so that the caseworker can pop in if need be. 

Also, the planned reunification date of May 2 is indefinitely postponed until more progress is made.


They also led us to believe that they were going to be moving Bella to the foster home that her sister is in.  There are several good reasons to do this, living with her sister being at the top of that list, as well as the fact that her sister’s foster home is in their home town (an hour and a half from here.).

But,  I got an e-mail today saying that the hospital social worker, her nurse, and her doctor, have all requested that she remain at our house.  So, as of right now, that’s the plan.  Overall, I have to say that I’m happy with this decision.



Part of me is so angry that Mom messed this up for Bella again.  Bella wants to go home so badly – and the things they are asking of them are not difficult.  I just want to shake her (mom) and say, “Do you not realize that there are a lot of kids in foster care that never go home???  This is not a game!  This is not just something that you have to ride out until they send her home!!”


On the other hand, I see them, and their lives are so much different than ours in so many ways that we take completely for granted.  Everything in their lives is stressful – paying the bills, keeping their car running, the health of their daughter, their marriage.  And it’s probably been this way for generations.

I’m not sure I can imagine what it would be like to be in their shoes, so I most definitely cannot say that I’d be any better off.


Anyway, we are hoping for a quick turnaround for mom and dad.  Prayers for Bella are greatly appreciated.  I anticipate a few really hard weeks as we transition to much shorter visits. 


  1. Praying for sweet Bella! How rough to have so many changes in the case- I hope that she transitions well to her visits and that her mom is able to do everything needed to complete the case plan. Enjoy that girl for a little bit longer. You seem to be doing a great job!

  2. That is so sad for Bella. I wish her parents could pull it together.


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