I got a comment a few days ago, along with an e-mail, that has been on my mind a lot. It hit a very personal nerve, but I figured that it could only be helpful to share openly here.
Both the comment and the e-mail referred to the blog as a place for foster parents to give themselves a little proverbial back pat. A “good job, you’re doing a great thing.”
This is not at all my intention. And if it comes off that way, I am really, very sorry.
I am just a normal person. (Actually ‘normal’ may be a little too flattering.) I am not special. I am, in fact, broken and sinful. This ‘fostering’ thing that I do, it’s in an attempt to love. I don’t profess to be great at it – in fact most of the time I feel like I’m flying by the seat of my pants (at times straight into a brick wall.). In fact, Brian has said many times that he hopes that people look at us and think, “Well, if the Popps can do it, ANYONE can do it!”
The truth is, is that if it weren’t for Jesus, His grace for me, His love,
I wouldn’t be a foster parent at all.
There have been several times in this journey that if it weren’t for Christ,
I would have quit. Walked away. Stopped caring.
It is in my nature to be selfish. To want my life to be about me. If it weren’t for God, that is what I would choose. It doesn’t feel good to say that. To be completely honest, I wish that fostering was something that I could brag about – but it’s not.
The purpose of this blog is not to make myself feel good.
My hopes for this blog are that it helps to make fostering less scary for people who are considering it. I hope to show people a need that they don’t know is there. I hope to encourage people to step out in love. I hope to make fostering, and the lives of these kids real. I hope to be an advocate for these kids. I hope to be a place where current foster parents can find fellowship and encouragement.
But mostly, I hope to glorify my creator in all of this. I hope to make Him shine. I hope to show others His love. If He uses me for this, I’ll count it a blessing.
So there is no back patting. There is nothing to pat our backs about. I am doing what He has asked of me – and sometimes I pout and stomp my feet along the way. What I’m meaning to say is this is not about me.
It’s about Him.
It’s about kids who need love.
It’s about being God’s hands and feet on this earth.
There are no backs to pat here.