April 16, 2010

How God Makes Us.

We were having a particularly hard evening.  The boys were wound up and were choosing not to listen to anything we said, no consequences seemed to phase them, and finally they got to the consequence that is the end of the world for young boys – an early bed time.
We had them get ready for bed and go lay down.  Zee was overly upset, making it obvious that the early bed time was not the only thing bothering him.  Unfortunately, as foster parents, we often get the brunt of the anger, frustration, and sadness that results from the crappy situation that they’ve been thrown into.
In anger Zee yelled, “I don’t even want to be a foster kid!  I don’t even WANT to be here!”
Also in anger Jae replied, “Well Zee, I guess that’s just how God made us.”

My boys,
   Let me clarify a few things.

You are not ‘foster kids.’  You are kids who just happen to be in foster care through no fault of your own.  Your foster experience does not define who you are.  Not in my eyes, and NOT in God’s eyes.
This world is broken.  Some really shady stuff goes down because we, us humans, are broken.  God did not make you to be ‘foster kids.’  It’s because we are broken that you are here.  And it sucks.
But don’t you think for one minute that God created you for this heartbreak.  God created you in his sweet image.  You are so precious in His sight, and he would give anything for you.  I can guarantee that it breaks His heart to see you hurt so bad.  He loves you more than anyone else in the world.
It is a lie that you were made to be a child in foster care.  He created you with beauty in mind.  With strength and love and glory in mind.  He created you to know Himself – the greatest joy we can know.
Don’t you believe anything less.  Don’t you believe that your time in foster care makes you any less loved, any less a child of God, or any less a beautiful creation.  God created you as His child, and He loves you as His child.
You will make it through this.  You will not always be a ‘foster kid.’  And I pray that if there is one thing you leave our home with, it is the knowledge of His love.  He will bring you through this.  And someday He will even use this if you let Him – but I’m getting ahead of myself.
You are loved with a love so fierce we cannot comprehend it.  He did not create you for this situation, and He will not abandon you in it.
He loves you.  I love you.
And you are not just a ‘foster kid.’


  1. So beautiful, Maggie. I'm so glad that you and Brian are speaking the gospel of God's great love into the lives of these kids.

  2. Perfectly said. I hope the boys had a better night.

  3. Those are words that every child in foster care needs to hear. Every single one. These boys will look back years from now and realize how you displayed God's love to them while they were living with you!

  4. This brings tears to my eyes. Don't know how else to say it except, AMEN, I agree!! I am humbled and challenged by your consistent and faithful answer to the call of Jesus in all the big and little things...

  5. We believe that every child that crosses our door is in our home for a purpose. We also believe that every time they leave, God's providence is also in play.

    That moment. Your love. Your faithfulness. Your grace is why those boys were chosen for you. You can be the love of God for those boys. He loves them enough to bring them to your house. And it's so clear that he loves you enough to bring them to your house.

    We have a remarkably loving God. It's a beautiful thing to see the reality of that play out.

  6. Awwww now that I know them, that made me cry...they are such precious kiddos!

  7. This is so well said, Maggie! I pray that the boys would learn of God's love from you and Brian and would be changed by it.


Thanks for commenting!!


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