(just after we said our good night prayers, I realized I hadn't given Jae a hug, so I went back into his room to find him gently crying)
Brian: "Jae, I forgot to ask if you wanted a hug before you went to bed, do you want a hug?"
Jae: (sniffles a bit) "Brian, I have a question, tell me if this sounds fair: At camp I met a foster kid who has been away from his mom for seven years, even though his brother still lives with his mom. How is that fair?
Brian: "I don't know Jae"
Jae: "And now he says he gets to go back to his mother. He's so lucky."
Jae: "Brian, I have a question: who invented foster care?"
Brian: "I don't know Jae. It was created to keep kids safe though"
Jae: "I hate that person. I wish it didn't exist to I could be with my mother."
Brian: "Jae, I wish foster care didn't have to exist either."
Jae: "I don't even know why I'm in foster care, it's so confusing. Do you know why I'm here?"
Brian: "Because it wasn't safe for you to be at your house anymore, Jae."
Jae: "But I felt safe, who says it's not safe?"
Brian: "The people who's job it is to keep you safe."
Jae: "You don't even know how hard it is for me right now.
(eyes well up again)
I'm scared. I could be adopted by somebody I don't even know. What if I don't like them?"
Brian: "Jae, when you moved here you didn't know me and Maggie, right?"
Jae: "Yeah, but I've been here for three months now."
Brian: "But now you know us and love us and know that you are loved here. Whoever adopts you will love you too."
Jae: "I just want to be adopted by my family."
Brian: (now I'm crying too) "Jae, I cry for you guys all the time. I wish I could just make it go away, make it all go away and just be normal, but I can't. All I can do is love you, and try to make you understand that God loves you, and that he has a plan for you."
Jae: "God doesn't have a plan for me."
Brian: "Yes he does Jae, he will use you for great things if you let him.
I love you Jae. Good night."